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Definition funny of Albertson:
Service first, second to none.
Lady: "Your store sucks & this bread was supposed to be 3 for a dollar not 2 for a dollar!" Us: "You're so totally right ma'am. Please wait here while I smash myself in the nuts for you and while we're at it get one of my other employees to go check to see if you're right so we can save you those 33 cents that you oh so need."
A once respected grocery store chain started by a humble man, beloved and respected by his community for his fair business policies. New stores were constructed only after the money to pay for them was earned, and "Better" was valued above "Bigger." Now a bloated shell of its former being, taking on debt faster than the Titanic took on water, and helmed by an ego and no longer a man. "Bigger at any cost" valued over "Better," and their prices prove it.
"Oh my God Larry, have you seen Albertsons stock since the merger?" "Hell yes Bob, it went down faster than an ugly actress at a casting call."
A hell hole where even if you make friends the cock-sucking upper managers (namely the first and SECOND in charge) won't let you talk even if your work is done. Plus they complain about you and don't trust you if you're a teen, even if you're one of the better workers! And they wont fire the shitty ones! And the customers bitch about every little thing! They try to scam you to save even just 5 cents! Fuck coupons too, that shit is lame, why the hell do we take other stores coupons? Then there's the bottle room! That shit is so gross! It's never clean and there's always stinky bums back there. Luckily there are some cool people! Like managers that let you go on Chipotle or Jamba runs! Or get you drunk! Checkers that are smokin' hot and funny! Starbucks girls that worked at hooters! And baggers that you can mess around with and have a good time!
"If you don't find something to do I'll find something for you" "Why can't you take my coupon?!" "Because it expired in 2005!" "You guys suck i'm going to Safeway!" "Have a good day! And I hope you get hit by a bus! bitch!" "Albertsons would be so much better if I chose who worked there!" "Albertsons should have a back room with stripper poles!"
A place where human beings turn into beasts and try to save as much money as they can...it's a place where you see certain soccer moms everyday because they have nothing better to do after they dropped off Talan, Shiloh, and Dakota at soccer pratice. Certain customers can earn a title known as "Legend" if they are deemed worthy by a certain group of cool employees. These "cool employees" pretty much run the store and are all smoking hot, no homo. Such legends at one particular store in Rowland Heights include: Cabbage Patch Lady, Duckman, Paper Bag Lady, Cat Lady, Orca Lady, Leather Man, Benson & Hedges Lady, etc. And the hoes that work there will dress up all skanky and come into the store on their off days to show off. This is what is referred to as "Cake-Walking". They will come in and buy gum or something not needed...they will then precede to have sex with many dudes and do drugs. And once in a while, you can spot cholos running out of the store with stolen beer.
Songs about Albertson:
Jack Albertson by Buddy Lester from the Album Buddy Lester's Their Favorite Joke
Jack Albertson [Explicit] by Buddy Lester from the Album Buddy Lester's Their Favorite Jokes [Explicit]
Lost in the Rhythm (feat. Sam Albertson, Heath Bowell & Jordan Gingrich) by Jaeky Spencer from the Album Lost in the Rhythm (feat. Sam Albertson, Heath Bowell & Jordan Gingrich)
Overboard (feat. Kia Albertson Rogers) by The Mimis from the Album Mimi and the Stone
Red Riding Hood: Going to Grannie's House (feat. Reese Stewart Albertson, Joseph Alexander Hearn, Zoe Stewart,... by Once Upon An Opera from the Album Red Riding Hood (aka Secret Of The Ninja)
Red Riding Hood: Happy Ending (I'm Sorry) (feat. Zoe Stewart, Tiana Knights, Reese Stewart Albertson, Joseph Alexander... by Once Upon An Opera from the Album Red Riding Hood (aka Secret Of The Ninja)
Red Riding Hood: I'll Take the Cake (feat. Joseph Alexander Hearn, Reese Stewart Albertson, Zoe Stewart, James... by Once Upon An Opera from the Album Red Riding Hood (aka Secret Of The Ninja)
Books about Albertson:
Long Island genealogies. Families of Albertson, Andrews, Bedell, Birdsall .. (1895) by Mary Powell Bunker (Apr 24, 2013)
Genealogies of Long Island Families, from The New York Genealogical and Biographical Record. In Two Volumes. Volume... by Henry B. Hoff (Jul 12, 2010)
Long Island genealogies: families of Albertson, Andrews, Bedell by Mary Powell Bunker (Jan 1, 1895)
Albertson's, Inc. Business Background Report by ChoiceLevel Books (Jun 12, 2009)
Albertson: Webster's Timeline History, 1850 - 2007 by Icon Group International (May 17, 2010)
Albertsons debuts new wine brands at grocery and drugstores across U.S.(News, Notes & Trends): An article from... (Jun 1, 2005)
Albertsons debuts new wine brands at grocery and drugstores across U.S.(Dateline): An article from: StateWays (Jun 1, 2005)
Movies about Albertson:
Classic Movies: Dr. Christian Meets the Women DVD , Including Information on The History of Public Health. Directed... 2008 - Runtime: 1 hr 5 mins Directed by: William C. McGann
Ann Rutherford as a Hot Young Actress in Waterfront Lady DVD also starring Frank Albertson, John Farrell MacDonald... 2008 - Runtime: 1 hr 8 mins Directed by: Joseph Santley
American Gangster Comedy Movies: Killer Dill DVD Starring Stuart Erwin, Anne Gwynne, Frank Albertson, Mike Mazurki... 2008 - Runtime: 1 hr 15 mins Directed by: Lewis D. Collins
Kids and Children 8 Pack VHS Movies, Pokemon, the First Move: Mew Two Mew, Pokemon 2000, Richie Rich: Macaulay... -
Clarence & Rosa Lee Albertson Photo and Movie Memories 2007 -
Alice Adams / Region Free DVD / Audio: English / Subtitle: English, French, Chinese / Starring: Katharine Hepburn... -
Room Service /Region Free DVD / Audio: English / Subtitle: English, French, Spanish, Chinese / Actors: Groucho... -
Wiki information Albertson:
Albertson is a hamlet and census-designated place in Nassau County, New York, United States. The population was 5,182 at the 2010 census.
Jack Albertson was an American character actor who also performed in vaudeville. A comedian, dancer, singer, and musician, Albertson is perhaps best known for his roles as Manny Rosen in The Poseidon Adventure, Grandpa Joe in Willy Wonka & the...